ManekiNeko
Host
Dress Inspector for all 26 models
Deal... or No Deal?
Posts: 416
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Post by ManekiNeko on Feb 12, 2009 23:48:06 GMT -5
1¢ $1 $5 $10 $25 $50 $75 $100 $200 $300 $400 $500 $750 $1,000 $5,000 $10,000 $25,000 $50,000 $75,000 $100,000 $200,000 $350,000 $500,000 $600,000 $800,000 $1,000,000 $1,500,000 $2,000,000[/color] $2,800,000 $4,000,000[/color] $5,000,000 $7,000,000 $10,000,000[/color] $15,000,000 $25,000,000
Case Chosen: [27]
Cases Remaining: [2], [3], [5], [10], [11], [13], [15], [17], [19], [21], [25], [26], [29], [31], [33], [34] ::phone rings:: I think I'm going to regret this... ::pushes speakerphone button::
::puff of a cigarette is heard:: Aahhhh Shelly... man, you are the best. That was an incredible lovemaking session. ::exhales:: I feel so euphoric right now. Your offer? Ninety-two thousand dollars!
$92,000[/color]
Neko: There's a shocker. The offer fell because the Banker really enjoyed that round. I hate to think of exactly who or what he was consummating with. Anyways, the offer is at $92,000. If you push that button and say DEAL, it's all yours. If you say NO DEAL, you need to open four more cases before you'll hear from him again. My question to you, Shellly.... Deal.... or No Deal?
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Post by Shelly on Feb 12, 2009 23:48:39 GMT -5
That round was made of fail. In other news: Lovemaking? What the eff are you smoking, banker? You couldn't pay me enough money to have even a quick one with you. In the meantime, go back to effing yourself, since that's what you do best. NO DEAL. Next four: 2, 10, 34, 25
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ManekiNeko
Host
Dress Inspector for all 26 models
Deal... or No Deal?
Posts: 416
|
Post by ManekiNeko on Feb 15, 2009 3:32:15 GMT -5
I think he was implying that he just (f-bomb)ed you good.
#2... Stacey!
Stacey: Neko, did I tell you about the time that me and my girlfriends went out to eat.
Neko: No... I'm waiting on this one.
Stacey: The Taco Bell was closed so we had to eat each other's...
Neko: I'm guessing there was no Del Taco around. They're open 24 hours. Open the case!
$750
NICE! Okay... now to #10... lovely Anya!
Anya:: ::starts sobbing::
Neko: What's wrong?
Anya: Neko, are you cheating on me?
Neko: No. Why?
Anya: I feel so used! I found a box of condoms in your drawer. I thought we agreed. No condoms.
Neko: I don't use that brand. That's the Banker's brand.
Anya: Oh my God, what does he use them for?
Neko: I don't know. Just open the case!
$1,000,000
Owch! We must progress forward! #34.... that's Carolyn!
Carolyn: Neko, I love you to death and I love Bil Dwyer too!
Neko: Thank you, but why?
Carolyn: The guys at my work stopped asking me if the carpet matched the drapes!
Neko: What a sweetie. Open the case!
$75
Nice! Let's hope this round goes much better as I close out with #25... Alike!
Alike: Neko, I can't help but notice that you're sore in a certain area.
Neko: that's not true. It seems to be working fine.
Alike: Oh, it will be sore when we're done with it tonight. Your bed will be worn down too.
Neko: Open the case!
$600,000
That certainly could have been a lot worse!
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ManekiNeko
Host
Dress Inspector for all 26 models
Deal... or No Deal?
Posts: 416
|
Post by ManekiNeko on Feb 15, 2009 3:38:46 GMT -5
1¢ $1 $5 $10 $25 $50 $75 $100 $200 $300 $400 $500 $750 $1,000 $5,000 $10,000 $25,000 $50,000 $75,000 $100,000 $200,000 $350,000 $500,000 $600,000 $800,000 $1,000,000 $1,500,000 $2,000,000[/color] $2,800,000 $4,000,000[/color] $5,000,000 $7,000,000 $10,000,000[/color] $15,000,000 $25,000,000
Case Chosen: [27]
Cases Remaining: [3], [5], [11], [13], [15], [17], [19], [21], [26], [29], [31], [33] ::phone rings:: Oh boy... isn't this fun? ::pushes the speakerphone button::
Banker: Shelly, Shelly, Shelly. Haven't you figured it out yet? You're in the presence of a superiorly intelligent person and I know how to get under your skin. Here's one way... ::pushes a button and a video screen appears with Shelly opening the $25M and $15M cases back to back:: That's a funnier video than anything ol' Bergie can create. I'll cut to the chase: One million, two hundred and thirteen thousand dollars!
$1,213,000[/color]
Neko: well, looks like the offer is back up to $1,213,000. If you push that button and say DEAL, it's all yours. If you say NO DEAL, I'll need you to open three more cases before you talk to him again. My question to you: Deal... or No Deal?
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Post by Shelly on Feb 16, 2009 1:04:31 GMT -5
Banker, banker, banker. Haven't YOU figured it out yet? You're in the presence of a superiorly intelligent person who is going to set you back $10 million... ANNNNNNND STRIP, ALL YOU OVER 18 LADIES IN THE AUDIENCE. (They do; camera switches from banker's video to live strippage. ) Oh, and NO DEAL. Next three: 15 (because Brooke knows how to tell the banker off), 21 (because Tameka's got sass, yo), and 33 (for not much reason at all).
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ManekiNeko
Host
Dress Inspector for all 26 models
Deal... or No Deal?
Posts: 416
|
Post by ManekiNeko on Feb 18, 2009 2:24:16 GMT -5
#15... Brooke!
Brooke: Neko, I am so happy right now. This reminds me of my senior year in high school.
Neko: Do tell.
Brooke: Okay, me and my class were two weeks from graduating. We were all a little over 18 and we were all taking a shower. Two hundred and eighty-three senior girls getting bubbly and wet...
Neko: all of you?
Brooke: Of course! Anyways, the fire alarm went off and we all ran out into the quad!
Neko: Please tell me you have a tape.
Brooke: I burned you a DVD. Anyways, so there we were, all of us and someone locked the gym door so we all went to class naked the rest of the day!
Neko: Damn. I thought you were going to chew out the Banker.
Brooke: THE BANKER WAS BEHIND THAT? WHEN I GET UP THERE, I'M GONNA STOMP ON YOUR NUT SACK AND PULL YOUR SPLEEN OUT THROUGH YOUR A--HOLE!
Neko: Ask and ye shall receive, Shelly. Open the case!
$500,000
OOW! Okay... #21... Tameka.
Tameka: Neko. We took a poll to see how you should have sex with us from now on. The vote was 34 to 1 that you can do it without a condom every time.
Neko: Really? 34 to 1?
Tameka: Yes.... ::glares at Heidi:: we had ONE holdout.
Heidi: (w) but I don't want to get pregnant... that's all.
Neko: Open the case!
$4,000,000
Gyah! God... that's rough. Okay... last up is #33... Emily!
Emily: Neko! I am ready for that party!
Neko: The one we're going to have next month?
Emily: Yes! I've already burned all the girls' swimsuits and...
Leyla: Uh, Emily... we were supposed to go to Fleming Beach tomorrow, remember?
Emily: Oh (S-bomb!)
Neko: Open the case!
1¢
NICE!
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ManekiNeko
Host
Dress Inspector for all 26 models
Deal... or No Deal?
Posts: 416
|
Post by ManekiNeko on Feb 18, 2009 2:54:07 GMT -5
1¢ $1 $5 $10 $25 $50 $75 $100 $200 $300 $400 $500 $750 $1,000 $5,000 $10,000 $25,000 $50,000 $75,000 $100,000 $200,000 $350,000 $500,000 $600,000 $800,000 $1,000,000 $1,500,000 $2,000,000[/color] $2,800,000 $4,000,000 $5,000,000 $7,000,000 $10,000,000[/color] $15,000,000 $25,000,000
Case Chosen: [27]
Cases Remaining: [3], [5], [11], [13], [17], [19], [26], [29], [31] ::phone rings:: This should be an interesting mix. Okay... ::pushes speakerphone button::
Banker: You do realize I have my own weapons that will fight against Shelly's menace... and what's with all the girls stripping? Doesn't our beloved host have enough body parts to look at? ::drops a pile of clothes on Shelly::
Neko: Ewww... you do realize those are his clothes and they're from his hamper!
Banker: Alright, alright... offer? You and the little nudists can get on out of here, but first dress them with the clothes I gave you, and take one million, eight hundred and forty-seven thousand dollars with you!
$1,847,000[/color]
Neko: Interesting. I'd have thought it to be a little lower but he did dump month old laundry on your head, so I bet he got a thrill out of that one. OKay... the offer stands at $1,847,000. If you push that button and say DEAL, I'll deposit that much into your account. If you say NO DEAL, you need to open two more cases before you hear from him again. Ten cases left in play... what is yours holding, Shelly? Deal... or No Deal?
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Post by Shelly on Feb 19, 2009 19:32:49 GMT -5
Anyone got some kerosene? And a fire pit?
NO DEAL.
Next two: 29 and 31
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ManekiNeko
Host
Dress Inspector for all 26 models
Deal... or No Deal?
Posts: 416
|
Post by ManekiNeko on Feb 21, 2009 18:06:42 GMT -5
#29... Jennifer!
Jennifer: Neko, Sirenia's going to do exhibiltion matches across the country this year!
Neko: Exhibitionists doing exhibition games. Whoda thunk?
Jennifer: And my dad said I'd never amount to anything if I kept walking around without my clothes on!
Neko: The nerve! What a loser! Open the case!
$7,000,000
Ooooh. That's painful! Okay... #31... that's Kaitlin!
Kaitlin: Yo, Neko.... We're going to have a class reunion this year... all the cheer girls from the Class of '07, '08 and '09 are going to get together.
Neko: Fun!
Kaitlin: Then we're going to tie you to the bed and give you such a hard sex ride that you won't be able to think clearly for the next month!
Neko: When is this going to happen?
Kaitlin: Right now! ::cheerleaders run out from every corner and trap Neko, tearing off his clothes::
Neko: MMMmmmmm... (thinking: with the cameras rolling?)... ::waves his hand for Kaitlin to open the case::
$5
Nice!
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ManekiNeko
Host
Dress Inspector for all 26 models
Deal... or No Deal?
Posts: 416
|
Post by ManekiNeko on Feb 21, 2009 18:13:36 GMT -5
1¢ $1 $5 $10 $25 $50 $75 $100 $200 $300 $400 $500 $750 $1,000 $5,000 $10,000 $25,000 $50,000 $75,000 $100,000 $200,000 $350,000 $500,000 $600,000 $800,000 $1,000,000 $1,500,000 $2,000,000[/color] $2,800,000 $4,000,000 $5,000,000 $7,000,000 $10,000,000[/color] $15,000,000 $25,000,000
Case Chosen: [27]
Cases Remaining: [3], [5], [11], [13], [17], [19], [26] ::phone rings and Neko is way too predisposed to answer it so the speakerphone automatically turns on::
Banker: Well, I can see that Neko has his hands full, not to mention other body parts. So that means you're going to deal with me the entire time, although I think he's only an amateur. What guy has only 36 girls going at him like that? I could get 50, easily. But as for you, Shelly... I just have one thing to say to you: YOU SUCK! You knocked out that 7 million and my farts are more fun than you are. Okay... offer? One million, five hundred and eighteen thousand dollars!
$1,518,000[/color]
Banker: Don't bother disturbing Neko. I don't think he'll be ready before the next round. If you push that button and say DEAL, I'll give you that much money. If you say NO DEAL, you will need to open TWO more cases before I talk to you again. So Shelly... are you smart enough to take this deal? Deal or No Deal?
Neko: Hey, that's my line.
Jessica (Class of '09): It's not polite to talk with your mouth full... ::french kisses him as the other girls are doing naughty things with him::
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Post by Shelly on Feb 21, 2009 18:45:03 GMT -5
I'm way more fun than the banker will ever be. NO DEAL.
Next: 19. Come on, Heidi; nice 'n' low.
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ManekiNeko
Host
Dress Inspector for all 26 models
Deal... or No Deal?
Posts: 416
|
Post by ManekiNeko on Feb 21, 2009 23:58:04 GMT -5
Heidi: Neko, aren't you going to call me?
::Neko is way too busy getting his action to even notice::
Heidi: Boy he's definitely entertained. i'll just open the case!
$10
Neko: ::stands up now that he's done for now... Shelly... the quota is still 2. You need to give me another case...
::Neko is grabbed from behind by the cheerleaders and they continue on him::
Kandice: Hold still Neko... you're going to enjoy this!!
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Post by Shelly on Feb 23, 2009 0:17:52 GMT -5
Oh (s-bomb).
3.
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ManekiNeko
Host
Dress Inspector for all 26 models
Deal... or No Deal?
Posts: 416
|
Post by ManekiNeko on Feb 23, 2009 0:55:50 GMT -5
Lisa: Neko's having way too much fun there.
Neko: Mmmmmm!
Lisa: Honey, do you need anything? Some vaseline, maybe?
Neko: Mop... en.... the.... caiii.....
Lisa: What?
Banker: For God's sake, he said open the case!
$5,000
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ManekiNeko
Host
Dress Inspector for all 26 models
Deal... or No Deal?
Posts: 416
|
Post by ManekiNeko on Feb 23, 2009 1:24:15 GMT -5
1¢ $1 $5 $10 $25 $50 $75 $100 $200 $300 $400 $500 $750 $1,000 $5,000 $10,000 $25,000 $50,000 $75,000 $100,000 $200,000 $350,000 $500,000 $600,000 $800,000 $1,000,000 $1,500,000 $2,000,000[/color] $2,800,000 $4,000,000 $5,000,000 $7,000,000 $10,000,000[/color] $15,000,000 $25,000,000
Case Chosen: [27]
Cases Remaining: [5], [11], [13], [17], [26] ::phone rings and again the speakerphone turns on automatically::
Banker: Someone get those GD cheerleaders off of our host! Christ, this isn't the Playboy Channel!!
::a group of the Banker's dancers pulls the girls off of Neko and they all cry out "We'll wait for you backstage, Neko!!", some try to break free from the clutches of these dancers::
Neko: Why did the Banker have to ruin my fun?
Banker: Shut up, cat boy. This is a FAMILY show. I'd like it if you didn't have dozens of cheerleaders trying to bang your brains out. As for you, Shelly... so you think you're on your game because you knocked out a couple of low amounts? Hah! You're pathetic. Take two million, five hundred and eighty-eight thousand dollars and just beat it!
$2,588,000[/color]
Neko: Okay. The bank offer stands at $2,588,000. If you push that button and say DEAL, It's all yours. If you say NO DEAL, now we're at a point where you only open one case at a time. Kicking the banker's arse, however, for taking away my cheerleader fun, is entirely optional. So my question to you: Deal... or No Deal?
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